1. hoganddice:

    takethethirdoption:

    I went to an Arab-American comedy night and there was a Muslim guy making a joke about being in high school football.

    "I was hit so hard, I saw Jesus. Do you know how hard you have to be hit to see somebody else’s god?"

    This is what jokes about religion are supposed to look like.

    (via opportunities-abound)

  2. shuckl:

unclefather:

infinitecringe:

beemill:



via lstarlet

My bees wouldn’t stay out of my dog’s watering bowl and not only were they annoying her but they were drowning in large numbers.
At first I tried using a bird bath and changed the water twice a week for my bees, but never saw them using it. I think it was too close to the hive (they like their water source to be a bit farther away from the hive) and the birds were always in it.
So then I turned a medium sized pot into a water garden with plants and a piece of wood for them to land on. The bees are loving it! Every time I have gone to check on it there are 20+ of them drinking. Since I have set up the garden I have not found a bee in the dog bowl.
As for preventing mosquitoes, I plan on ordering a few tadpoles or feeder fish.
Edit for pictures. http://imgur.com/a/jDKVi




SO CUTE

"my" bees? who the fuck owns bees as a pet

beekeepers
  3. sexhaver:

    i knew a dude in college who kept an old Smirnoff bottle full of water on his desk and would casually chug straight out of it in the middle of conversations with new people in order to establish dominance

    (via opportunities-abound)

  4. sexhaver:

    i knew a dude in college who kept an old Smirnoff bottle full of water on his desk and would casually chug straight out of it in the middle of conversations with new people in order to establish dominance

    (via opportunities-abound)

  5. herbgardening:

hippie-galaxy:

This is perfect.

YES
  6. dannerzz:

    my mom has been a cop for over 20 years and she is the one who constantly warns me about police aggression and young male cops and told me that if you’re ever alone on a rural road and a cop throws their lights on to put on your four ways and drive to the next gas station before stopping because so many cops are scum and it’s not worth the chance of getting hurt. the fact that SHE feels the need to tell me this shit scares me to death

    (via opportunities-abound)

  7. 420-247:

    chanted:

    I hate it when you are having a bad day and everyone takes it personally, like no i hate myself, not you. get the fuck over yourself.

    wow i’m actually so glad this post has been made

    (via opportunities-abound)

  8. grumpysalmon:

    How many people have broken into a store late at night to steal a cook book because they were hungry and wanted to know how to cook the perfect bean casserole? I’ll give you a hint: please bail me out of jail

    (via death-by-lulz)

  9. australianpikachu:

australianpikachu:

australianpikachu:

*leaves facebook forever*
  10. askinnyblackman:

420faded:

heteroh:

prostituteryan:

radryro:

prostituteryan
I LOOKED UP CACTUS PUNS

THIS IS INCREDIBLE.


Are these drake lyrics

Except cactus is singular and cacti is plural

they’re breaking up, this post is not cute at all
  11. mumtazi:

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